What would it mean for you to have a more connected and loving relationship with your child?
Probably a lot.
The connection you have with your child is the foundation to having a relationship with more cooperation, trust and respect.
I've helped other parents build this foundation
here's my story...
Granite State of Mind....
I am my journey.
Me, the oldest of a pack of five raised in the woods of New Hampshire—three younger brothers and one sister, no less.
Leaning on each other as a family, I learned to meet life directly, unafraid to get dirty, able to meet conflict and crisis when it comes. And it does come…to all of us.
In the three decades since my arrival in California, I’ve seen the struggles of families in crisis. Working as an outpatient therapist with abused children, leading court-ordered parenting groups, and managing treatment for suicidal children and teens, my experience has taught me so much about the struggles we all face.
I created Mindful Kids and Families to ease the struggle of parents and children stuck in the cycle of unhealthy relationships.
Teaching families how to rebuild attachment and connection is my passion.
Standing Side-by-Side with Parents..
Me, again, learning the science of connection and attachment in my early clinical training in Parent-Child Interaction Therapy (PCIT). Using PCIT, I taught mothers and fathers how rebuild trust with their children, coaching them moment by moment with their kids, teaching them how to react and respond—down to the very words to say—to repair fractured connections with their children.
Later, coaching would transform some of my toughest clients: frustrated, uncommunicative dads.
Summoning all the grit I collected growing up with three brothers, I pushed past the defensive bluster of fathers in court-ordered support groups, helping each learn a different way to be a dad.
Coming to understand their kids and themselves more fully, these fathers could embrace being the man who builds protects the relationship instead of just being the guy who punishes...Find the calm, build the connection.
Insight and Resilience...
Again, me, this time only a dozen years ago: I’m clutching a wool blanket against the chill of the California desert, sitting 10 days in silent retreat to experience the path of mindfulness I was teaching my clients to follow. The ground was hard -- the path was harder.
Through the intensive practice of non-reaction, I developed the resilience I needed to really sit with myself—all of myself—to know my mind and my heart.
A short time after, I am sorting through the debris of a divorce and coming to see that the role I had been playing was stealing the life I wanted to live.
Rebuilding my life as a solo parent meant creating a different vision of family, a vision centered on connection: to myself, to my child, and to my community.
A more loving, compassionate family life starts with who you are and how you parent.
Parent coaching with Mindful Kids and Families will teach you how to go within and reconnect with your core self, the person waiting beneath the old habits and patterns that keep you from the joyful, connected life you most desire.
This business was created for purpose and to give back, my son and I have chosen two causes we will support with profits from this business, you can check them out here:
Bonus...although I grew up outside Boston and in the New Hampshire woods, I ditched the accent yet it's been known to return at times.
I keep myself grounded most mornings on the mat, I have a lot of energy and I'm dedicated to HIIT, trail running (when my knees allow it) but most days I'm running on chai tea lattes and a lot of gratitude.
I also love karaoke and I do a mean rendition of "Two Out of Three Ain't Bad" by Meatloaf, (if you don't know who that is...I'm guessing I'm older than you).
I am raising my tween son as a avid Red Sox fan within a progressive SF Bay Area suburban town, yet keeping him grounded with values of kindness, service and family...and with the grace of the New Hampshire woods
"Tess has a strong capacity to help guide other parents with ways to bond and develop a trusting relationship with their child(ren). She understands these relationships take time, but through the use of conscious parenting strategies can have a huge impact on the quality of your relationship with your child."
My Credentials and
Licenses and Education:
Certified Competent Coach, School of Coaching Mastery
Licensed Clinical Social Worker; California License: #LCS20482
M.S.W., Master’s in Social Work, Mental Health California State University, Sacramento, CA
Kaiser Permanente, Post-Graduate Clinical Resident Child/Adolescent Psychiatry, Oakland, CA
CSCSW, California Society for Clinical Social Work
NCGPS, Northern California Group Psychotherapy Society
NASW, National Association of Social Workers
GGSC, The Greater Good Science Center
10 day Vipassana Meditation Retreat with S.N. Goenka – Joshua Tree, California
Raising Happiness Course with Christine Carter, PhD
Trained in the Mindful Schools Curriculum with Megan Cowan and Kate Janke
Mindfulness with Children – with Leslie Grant and Gary Buck, PdD
The Whole Brain Child Approach: Develop Kids Minds and Integrate Their Brains for Better Treatment Outcomes – with Tina Payne Bryson, PhD
Mindful Motherhood with Cassandra Vietan, PhD
Energy Psychology: Mind/Body Techniques (EFT) for Emotional Management with Carol Odsess, PhD