How to Help Your Teen Manage Their Own Screen Time — Without Power Struggles or Guilt

If you’ve ever asked your teen to put their phone away… only to get hit with “But you’re on yours!” — you’re not alone.

For single parents, especially, navigating screen time boundaries with tweens and teens is one of the most emotionally charged and frequently misunderstood aspects of parenting today.

In a recent episode of [Your Podcast Name], I sat down with Tess Connolly, LCSW, to unpack:

• Why screen time fights aren’t really about screens
  
• When your teen should start taking more ownership over their digital use
  
• And how your own screen habits (yes, even the necessary work ones) impact your credibility
  
  

Why This Is a Big Deal

Teens today are growing up with constant access to phones, tablets, and laptops. And while technology isn’t inherently bad, it can become a major battleground—especially when teens feel controlled, misunderstood, or unfairly policed.

Tess shared that screen-time boundaries should shift with development. A 12-year-old may need tighter guardrails, but by age 15, it’s time to start building internal discipline—not just enforcing external limits.

Modeling Matters More Than You Think

Many parents struggle with this: How can you set rules for your teen when you’re constantly on your device for work?

The answer isn’t perfection—it’s communication and consistency.

Tess suggests narrating your use:

“It’s time for my phone to go to bed.”
“I’m checking this email now, but after that, it’s off for the night.”

This shows your teen what mindful use looks like. And it also makes screen boundaries feel more like life skills—and less like punishment.

Takeaways for Parents

• Meet your teen where they are developmentally. Don’t expect adult-level discipline from a child who’s still learning self-regulation.
  
• Shift from control to coaching. Empower your teen to practice setting their own limits while you’re still around to support them.
  
• Be honest about your own tech habits. Model what you want to see, and narrate it out loud.
  
  

Final Thoughts

Your teen won’t become a perfectly balanced digital citizen overnight. But by shifting the focus from enforcement to education—and from guilt to growth—you’ll set them (and yourself) up for a healthier relationship with screens.

🎧 Listen to the full episode here.