Why Correcting Your Teen in January Doesn’t Work—And What To Do Instead
Jan 06, 2026
If you've already found yourself repeating instructions, nagging about screen time, or bracing for another eye-roll from your teen—take a breath. January is a tough month for both parents and kids. But here’s the truth that might surprise you: the problem isn’t your parenting—it’s your timing.
Trying to “correct” behavior right after the holidays is like trying to bake cookies in a cold oven. Nothing lands right, and everyone ends up burned out.
So what’s the fix?
It’s what I call the emotional on-ramp—a way to reset how you start conversations with your teen so you actually get through to them.
Why January Correction Backfires
After the holidays, most teens are emotionally dysregulated.
They’re coming off:
- Late nights
- Too much screen time
- Little structure
- Heightened emotions
Meanwhile, you’re likely ready to get life back on track. So you start setting expectations—school, bedtime, chores, phone limits—but your teen shuts down.
Why?
Because their nervous system is still in “rest and resist” mode. Correction feels like pressure. Even mild frustration from you sounds like an emotional threat to them. And instead of listening, their brains flip into defense mode.
The Real Reason Teens Don’t Respond: It’s Not What You Say, It’s How You Start
This is why even good boundaries can backfire.
The best parenting isn’t about being more forceful—it’s about being more attuned.
Before you give the rule, you need to warm up the relationship. And that’s where the 3-Step Reset comes in.
The 3-Step January Reset That Builds Connection AND Cooperation
Step 1: Ask First.
Say: “Is now a good time to talk for a minute?”
This gives your teen a moment of choice. That one question lowers resistance and creates openness.
Step 2: Lead with Empathy.
Say: “I know getting back into school mode feels heavy.”
You’re not excusing behavior—you’re showing you see their experience. That helps their nervous system regulate.
Step 3: Ease Into the Ask.
Say: “I noticed the phone’s been staying in your room later than we agreed. Let’s reset this together.”
You’re setting the boundary—but with connection first. That makes the boundary more effective and less combative.
Why This Works (Especially for Single Parents)
If you’re parenting solo, you don’t have a second adult to buffer these moments. Your tone sets the climate of the home.
By slowing down and starting with connection, you’re not giving in—you’re getting through.
Final Thoughts
You don’t have to say things perfectly. You just have to say them differently.
This small reset can reduce power struggles, increase cooperation, and bring more calm to your home this year.
🎧 Listen to the full podcast episode:
“3 Mistakes Parents Make With Teens in January—And How to Avoid Them for Better Communication”
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